Landmines

You don't describe pain. Because it causes you to lose your emotional footing and stumble back into the memories you've locked away. You don't describe it, because it's just too hard. But if I could, I would describe it as a black abyss, so dark, the tugging hands of depression clawing at your side, refusing to let you go. And you just struggle, fighting it off, walking on, walking on, and if you're lucky enough, the claw marks subside into a killer headache, throbbing. 

But if you succumb to the fears and the charitable deception of depression, you fall harder, faster, deeper. It sucks you in so fast your head spins. The next thing you know, a live band sounds like a dull drone that hurts your head. The sunlight that streams in your room becomes blinding and hurts your eyes. The chirping of birds becomes screeching monsters. The mere thought of getting out of bed fills you with dread. The action of replying messages leaves your fingers heavy. The idea of bathing fills your legs with sand.

Then again, I'm being melodramatic. 

I'm just grateful. I realize and appreciate the friends that have stuck by my throughout. And though it seemed as if their presence made no difference, it did, significantly. It made my depressing thoughts, not so depressing. After all the glitz and glamour, the ones that've stayed by my side right till the end, are the ones that matters. And trust me, I know who matters now.